When Work & Family Collide

Video Session

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. —Ephesians 5:21

Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her . . . - Ephesians 5:25

The thing that wars against breathing room in our life more than anything else is FEAR.

Team Discussion Questions (DOWNLOAD)

1. How do you feel about Andy’s word picture of handing over a rock when we ask our spouse, kids, etc. to bear a responsibility that doesn’t belong to them?

2. What is it specifically that competes for your time and attention (while your loved ones are left “holding rocks”)? Hours at work? Required travel? A time-consuming hobby?

3. Andy decided to create breathing room for his family by leaving work at 4 p.m. But he faced real fears before making that decision. (I’m afraid of what people will think. I’m afraid they’ll think I’m lazy. What happens when I tell people in the church I can’t come to ANYTHING in the evening?)

a. What could you decide to do/stop doing that would create breathing room for your family?

b. What are your specific fears around making that decision?

I’m afraid ______________________________________________________________.

I’m afraid ______________________________________________________________.

I’m afraid ______________________________________________________________.

4. How well does your team/organizational culture support you prioritizing family over work? (Use a scale from 1–10 if that helps.)

For more on this topic . . . read When Work & Family Collide (excerpt below).

Every time you cheat your family—no matter how trivial—it represents a draw against someone’s emotional strength. Every time. Regardless of how much money you have in the bank, when you make a withdrawal, you have a little less. Regardless of how happy and healthy your family is, when you take what’s expected at home and give it to someone or something else, you’ve made a withdrawal. If the deposits don’t vastly outnumber the withdrawals, there’ll be tension. The tension will ruin the joy of coming home. When you no longer enjoy coming home, you’ll look for more reasons to stay away. That, of course, only makes things worse.

If there were physical rocks [being held by your loved ones], our jobs would be easier. It would be next to impossible for us to lose sight of this important relationship. But there are no rocks…


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