your wiring colors your group experience.
I'M A SANGUINE (YELLOW) GROUP MEMBER
FUN & ENERGETIC
As a people-focused extrovert, you bring
the energy, the laughs, and maybe even a few hugs to the group dynamic. You’re quick to
contribute to the discussion, even if it means talking over more introverted members. Practice
curiosity. Ask your group members thoughtful questions. Your magnetism will make everyone
feel heard and valued.
Small group is a great opportunity to meet
new people and hear their stories. And what Yellow doesn’t love a good story? On the flip
side, tough stories can make a Yellow squirm. Small group should be a safe place to
practice authenticity, so avoid the desire to skim over the hard stuff or use comic relief when
tough situations arise.
If you're curious about all the other ways your wiring
impacts your group experience, check out I Said This, You Heard That. The
book and companion videos may change every conflict and conversation you ever have—for
good. Visit www.isaidyouheard.study.
I'M A CHOLERIC (RED) GROUP MEMBER
STRONG & DECISIVE
As a task-focused extrovert, it’s common
for you to speak up first—especially in those first few seconds when everyone is processing the
question. You may find it difficult to wait for and listen to the responses of others. Remember:
small group is about community and connection, and sometimes that means prioritizing people
over completing the list of discussion questions. It’s important to keep the group on task and on
time—but never more important than allowing space for relationships to build.
Whether you’re the official leader of the group or just the person who’s always
nudging everyone along in the discussion, your confidence and decisiveness often earn you a
position of authority in your small group. Resist the trap of becoming the “boss,” and
instead look for opportunities to defer to other members of your group.
If you're curious about all the other ways your wiring impacts your
group experience, check out I Said This, You Heard
That. The book and companion videos may change every
conflict and conversation you ever have—for good. Visit www.isaidyouheard.study.
I'M A MELANCHOLIC (BLUE) GROUP MEMBER
THOUGHTFUL & ORDERLY
As a task-
focused introvert, committing to small group pushes you out of your comfort zone. Meeting new
people and opening up about your life feels risky—and opening up is not something you do with
just anyone. You share your thoughts sparingly, but when you do speak up,
your views add to the discussion in a big way!
You may also function as
the organizational glue of the group by sending out email reminders, prayer requests, and
logistical details to the others. Your sensitivity, empathy, and compassion are deep strengths
that create a sense of safety, belonging, and care within your group.
If you're curious about all the other ways your wiring impacts your group experience, check
out I Said This, You Heard That. The book and companion videos may
change every conflict and conversation you ever have—for good. Visit www.isaidyouheard.study.
I'M A PHLEGMATIC (GREEN)
PEACEFUL & KIND
You’re an introvert who loves people. That’s not an oxymoron. A natural-born shepherd, you
live to serve others but do so by being an incredible listener, mentor, and friend. It’s not
uncommon for Greens to be so others-focused that they forget about themselves.
Prioritizing yourself and your spiritual growth is the key to being the healthiest version of you.
Are you stressed out by questions like:
What should we study next? What kind of snacks should we serve? Where are we
meeting? Of course you are! Greens are prone to decision fatigue.
Delegating the decisions to other group members (Hello, Reds!) will help minimize your stress
so you can focus on what’s most important to you—the people in your group.
When it’s time to tell stories in your group, you think . . .
When it’s your turn to bring snacks, you . . .
When it’s time for your group meeting to end and discussion is still
going strong, you . . .
When it comes to group homework, you . . .
it’s time to choose a new study,
you . . .
Your group is discussing taking on a service project; you think
. . .
When your group comes to a close and it’s time to find a new group,
you think . . .